Last Call: Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Babes? Vodka? No Thanks

’Member when you were in college, and every weekend, you felt like something cool was going on while you were stuck at home watching bad tv?

Me too, which is why when I was struck by a similarly awful mood last weekend, I felt the cold, creepy hand of death of my shoulder.

Not really, but I was bummed. See, it all goes back to MySpace. I haven’t wholly bought into it, even though, yes, I have my own cyber monument to how great and cool I am, and I access it almost every day. What I mean is that there’s a ton of info out there. Seems like every other minute, you’re getting invited to a party, or a mixer, a gig, an opening, and they’re all on Saturday night. You gotta figure that no more than three or four people are gonna go to the same event. Some folks might even freeze up at “the tyranny of small choices” (that’s what some philosopher calls it) and elect to stay home and watch bad tv.

Well, I didn’t freeze up — I did something worse. I went somewhere that might not have been bad had I not discovered later that the party of the year went off like a Roman candle just a few miles away.

I went to the Chapel Hill shopping center, near Central Market and Smoothie King, and paid a visit to the newly opened 29 Degree Tavern. There was beer, tables, chairs, tv’s, yadda-yadda.

I didn’t get the news until the next day. Any conversation about a party that begins with “Dooood! You totally missed it” is not good.

The soirée in question was the “X-Rated Lingerie Party” sponsored by X-Rated Vodka at Aqua Lounge downtown. I’m getting sick now just thinking about it: Victoria’s Secret-caliber young women paraded around in nothing but g-strings and bras. At the same time, I was sitting at a bar with other yuppies and sipping on bottled domestic beer, and I spent most of my time there wondering whether I should get the vanilla or chocolate soy milk from Central Market on the way home.

I also watched bad tv on the overhead set.

The moral of the story: Don’t ever doubt the awesome power of Mr. MySpace, and next time you go to a lingerie/free vodka party and don’t see me there, frickin’ call me immediately!!!

Somebody’s Watching Me

Always thinking of us, those nice folks at the Texas Alcoholic Beverage Commission.

First, they tried to cite us for drinking — in bars. We wouldn’t wanna get sick or anything now, would we? Now, the TABC is bending over backward for us once more, but this time, they really seem to have our best interests at heart.

As for bar/restaurant owners and other alcohol sellers: That’s another story.

Next month, the government agency will launch a section on their web site,, where we can look up which bars/restaurants/stores have committed TABC violations, how many, and what kind. Up until now, all that’s been available on the site has been permit and tax information for alcohol sellers.

The Public Inquiry System is not necessarily anything groundbreaking. Joe Q. Public has forever been able to e-mail, fax, or snail-mail a request to TABC for open records on a club and get the information “within a reasonable amount of time,” said Joan Bates, deputy general council at TABC in Austin. (From my experience, I can say that you may sometimes have to wait a day to a week, depending.)

Nothing crazy prompted the new feature. The TABC, Bates said, simply hadn’t had the technology to upload records until now. Thanks, TABC!

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